Journey to BFE

1. Drop bear off at in-laws' so he can drive himself to traffic school.
   
   
2. Get lost trying to find The Hat to satisfy my hankering for wet fries. This place is hard to come by in our hood.
   
   
3. Find Grand Burger while wandering instead. Even better! For once, my crap sense of direction pays off. I find the bear's hometown greasy spoon.
   
   
4. Buy a small order of chili cheese fries. $4.21 after tax for all this cheesy goodness. The unmelted cheese is especially delicious at Grand Burger, for some reason. Too bad it promptly melted, thanks to BFE sun + hot fries.
   
   
   
5. Find The Hat while driving to meet someone. But of course.
   
   
6. Drive even further BFE to visit with mom + the family minpin. Upon my arrival, I am greeted with two undoubtedly stale favors leftover from 5 weeks ago. Ew. I fail at trying to convince my mom to throw them out.
   
   
   
7. Pickup the bear and some jujubes [not the candy] from the in-laws' bajillion fruit trees. I momentarily forgot that I love their flavor but hate their dry, styrofoam-like texture. Yes, these are the same fruits that when dried are used in oriental herbal medicines and thrown at Korean brides + grooms to divine how many female offspring they'll have.
   
   
8. Do random other boring things that are even more boring than the above in which absolutely no one has interest in reading for the rest of the evening + night.