[office phone rings at 5:30 PM]
who the heck is calling me now? leave me alone!
me: this is dapotato. (unfortunately, that's not exactly how i answered my office line.)
never-will-be-employed-at-this-rate girl: hi. soooo...do you guys have any internships available?
me: unfortunately, we are not hiring any interns at this time.
NWBEATRG: [sounding indignant] uh, why not?!?
me: with our current workload and staffing, we do not require an intern at this point.
[what i wish i'd said: i don't have to answer that question, rude butt. good bye.]
NWBEATRG: so, you're not hiring?
me: we do have one position open for someone with a minimum of five years of experience, and that is our only current opening.
NWBEATRG: well, i want an internship or entry-level position.
me: like i said, i'm sorry, but we don't have any openings at that level right now.
NWBEATRG: oh. ok. thanks for your time anyway, i guess.
me: [dripping with sarcasm] my pleasure. bye. *click*
i highly doubt she sensed the sarcasm. and i'm not exaggerating what she said. i have transcribed it pretty much word-for-word here. i knew i shouldn't have answered my phone.
oh, and yes, we're hiring. to replace me. so let me know if you have any candidates as fabulous as or even better than me.